"Flying With An Infant" And Other Cliches That Never Took

Piece of cake.  Easy as pie.  On cloud nine.  These are just some examples of cliches that are used everyday.

Just for fun, why not examine some cliches that never quite took, and try to determine where they lost their way.   For example, instead of easy as pie, why not try this saying instead, "easy as flying with an infant."  I am currently on my way back to LA from the east coast, so this particular saying comes to mind.  On the way out, my baby fell asleep at takeoff and woke up during landing.  Flying with her was "easy as pie."  Or maybe "easy as flying with an infant."  But here is where it gets tricky: on this flight, it took her five hours until she fell asleep, and for all those five hours she was, well, a traveling infant, which now that I think about it answers my own question.

Okay, so what about "slept like a baby?"  That one is used to imply "slept very well," but that is not very accurate, is it?  Which makes me wonder why some cliches get away with being inaccurate and yet are accepted and widely used, while others are quickly discarded for the same reason.  For example, when is the last time you used, "flying with an infant" to imply a feeling of calmness and relaxation?  (That one keeps coming to mind no matter how deep I dig to find another saying.)  Why use a double standard for sayings?

Then there is another favorite, "pot calling the kettle black," which is used to call out someone for being hypocritical by accusing others of doing something they are also guilty of doing.  On this one "flying with an infant" might be equally interchangeable, because if ever 300 or so people are guilty of the same thing, it is a plane full of passengers praying that the infant will fall asleep.

And of course, you have "Abandon Ship!" which is, if you gave a flying infant the power of speech, how she would describe her activities during the long, crowded flight.